How To Fix A Broken Marriage?

You start feeling horrible when you realize things aren’t working in your marriage. A failing marriage is the worst situation in a relationship that we can ever imagine. Such cases leave you with anguish, pain, and resentment.  

You want to make things work but suddenly realize the damage is beyond repair. In such situations, the most commonly asked question is: How to fix a broken marriage?

Have you ever been in a situation to ask yourself how to fix a broken marriage? It’s not easy to fix a broken marriage, but fortunately, it’s not impossible. You can make your relationship work with careful steps and understanding of the causes of broken marriages. 

The main reasons behind broken marriages

Do you know how to fix a marriage when your trust is broken? Or want to know how to fix a marriage when your spouse is too lazy. 

There are many reasons behind broken marriages. Knowing the cause of the issue can help you learn how to fix a broken marriage. Here are a few main reasons why marriages fall apart. 

• Financial incompatibility
• Lack of shared interests, values, and cultural differences
• Mood swings or secretive behavior
• Domestic violence
• Cheating, adultery, or disloyalty
• Unrealistic expectations from partners
• Disagreements over parenting style
• Inequality and burdening the gender roles
• Sexual difficulties like cultural differences
• No appreciation resulting in depression
• Miscommunication
• Neglecting family and responsibilities
• Emotional incompatibility
• Emotional or mental abuse

Lack of empathy and proper communication is the most common reason for failing marriages. Some couples have a lack of emotional attachment and physical intimacy, which results in gradually growing apart and losing the connection that couples have. 

Sudden distances in couples can also be due to disloyalty, feeling bored, an affair, and many other reasons. Marriage counseling can help in resolving such conflicts and addressing the issues.

If you think you are patient enough to listen to each other sites with conflicts, you don’t need any third person to resolve your issues. In this article, I will take you through the expert’s recommended essential steps that will give you the answer to “How to fix a broken marriage?”

Ways to save a broken marriage

If you are wondering how to fix a broken marriage, take a step back to realize what’s happening with the relationship. Here are some of the most effective ways to save a broken marriage:

Give it another shot

According to the survey, the average length of a marriage is around eight years. If it hasn’t been long since you are married, give it another shot to make it work. Realizing your shortcomings in the relationship will help you take things better and survive any conflict. 

If your partner is ready to meet you halfway, you should also have the responsibility. When your spouse is willing to work on the marriage, it will survive. 

No relationship is perfect from the beginning. Sometimes, it takes a couple of tries from both people to understand how to strengthen the relationship. Divorce should be your last option when you can’t imagine being benign with others and leaving the relationship. When you are willing to work harder to save the marriage, then it’s worth saving.

Remember what made you fall in love.

Take time and remind yourself what made you fall in love with your spouse. Remember the good old days; the initial spark will heal the broken marriage. Remember the things that you like about your partner and decide to choose them as your life partner.

Self-reflection will help you find the main concern and realize they are still there for you. The busy work life and schedules create distances between you and him. 

Instead of losing hope, remind yourself of your beautiful memories with them. Show them love, keep a positive attitude, and hope to make the relationship work.  

Start listening to each other.

Have deep conversations in which you both listen to each other. Listen to what your partner tells you, and then ask them your questions. Try listening to each other more often, as it will help you develop understanding and remind you of the moments when you were great with these things. 

To make a marriage work, you must listen to your partner and understand what they expect from you and the relationship. 

Make a list of things you feel are wrong.

It’s a little tricky, but you must detect all the issues you find problematic in the marriage. Most people fail to fix their broken marriages because they don’t address the things that upset them. Trying to fix a marriage with a forced positive attitude will not help the condition. 

Forgetting your past will not erase it and will burden your heart for the rest of your life. List the things separately and ensure you understand you are doing this to save your marriage. So, what sort of things have you listed down?

Don’t let the distractions get in your relationship

There are many other things in your life, like a career, kids, and friends, but never let them get in your relationship. Life can get busy, but you must learn to stand firm together in good and bad times. 

Make it to a point to talk and care for each other no matter how busy life gets. Start dating your spouse again; it will help you save a broken marriage. It will help you two to spend more time together and keep yourself accountable to each other.

Have a deep look at yourself.

You must have heard the saying, “It takes two to tango.” Simply put, the problems in a relationship are rarely due to a single person. Start noticing your behavior to find out if it has contributed to breaking your marriage. 

We are humans, and we all make mistakes. But when we don’t admit them, it takes a toll on our personal and professional lives.

Have realistic expectations from your partner.

According to experts, marriages start falling apart when the partners don’t meet each other expectations. In such cases, resentment builds the distance in couples. The first step in making the marriage work is by working on all the resentments. 

You must have regular deep conversations on how well they are meeting each other needs. Make adjustments on both sides to make things better and foster hope. List down the needs you felt are left unmet in your relationship. Realistically analyze if your partner would be able to meet them. 

While listing the things, people often realize that sometimes we can’t address everything that upsets us. Instead of being defensive while managing your sorrow and pain, be sympathetic. 

Fix what you can

You might not be able to fix your spouse’s problems, but what you can do is improve your own set of issues. Even if the problems from your side aren’t as big as your spouse’s, you still have things you need to work on. 

Take accountability for your issues and encourage your spouse to be responsible for their own. It will show them you are making changes to save the broken marriage and fighting all the pain yourself. 

In a relationship, there needs to be a sense of partnership that helps you improve yourself and make efforts for the same shared goal. 

Tell your partner what you want from him.

Many people complain that they want their partner to help them wash dishes. They want to fix their marriage with such people. But in such cases, did you ask your partner about it? You resent him for failing to do these things for you, and your partner might not know about any of the issues. 

You might wonder if you have been together too long; he must know about such things. But for some people, that is only sometimes the case; they need a little guidance. 

Instead of assuming the situation, tell your spouse what you want from him. 

Be physically and emotionally intimate.

Making love isn’t the only way of intimation. You can fix a broken marriage with the power of touch. Hug and caress your spouse more often and hold hands. 

Such simple touches are the signs of sweetness that strengthen your bond by releasing the love hormone oxytocin. It can also help in bringing back the lost intimacy. Try getting to know each other better.

You can save a failing marriage when you get to know each other better.

FAQ’s

Can a broken marriage be repaired?

If you and your spouse are willing to make efforts and acknowledge your responsibility in the current state of marriage, then it’s possible. You can fix the marriage by improving your behavior that is causing issues. 

How to heal a broken marriage?

Here are some of the most effective tips to fix a broken marriage:

• Be reliable
• Create a love map
• Allow the influence of your partner on yourself
• Give yourself “me” time
• Have deep communication with your partner
• Take little steps to make your marriage healthy
• Don’t attack, criticize, or hold back
• Work on your flaws

Can we fix an unhappy marriage?

Some people wait years for their partners to move toward them, while others find they can’t wait for more than a year. People have fixed broken marriages, but it takes effort and work from both sides. A couple must be willing to work together to save their relationship.

What is a toxic marriage?

Simply put, a toxic relationship is one in which the partners don’t support each other. Instead, one person is trying to make efforts to save the relationship. In such a relationship, there is a sense of competitiveness instead of support. In such relationships, negativity far outnumbered positivity. 

Conclusion

Distance, disloyalty, trust issues, and miscommunication can affect marriages badly. Things can get out of control if you don’t deal with them timely. Therefore, if you feel that things are getting out of control, then don’t put off seeking help, as it can save the relationship. 

It’s wrong to think that things will get normal automatically. Try finding a pattern of your problems and the things resulting in conflicts. The relationship counselor will help you stay committed to making positive changes that will bring happiness and love to the relationship and fix the broken marriage.